


At Least the Sky is Blue

by dyoksoo



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Depression, Empath, M/M, References to Suicide, Very Slight Bullying
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-19
Updated: 2018-05-19
Packaged: 2019-05-09 00:57:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14706107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dyoksoo/pseuds/dyoksoo
Summary: Byun Baekhyun is all smiles and jokes, to everyone who is not Do Kyungsoo. Baekhyun has a secret and so does Kyungsoo, who happens to be the only one who knows Byun Baekhyun's secret.





	At Least the Sky is Blue

I put down my pencil, stretching as I let out a yawn. I had just finished my math classwork for the day after an hour of straight focus. I looked up to see a lot of my fellow classmates also done, talking to their friends or sneakily using their phones since the teacher isn't currently in the room. The sound of the door opening caught everyone's attention as they quieted down and put away their phones, so they wouldn’t get taken away.

The teacher walked in, dragging a student along with him by the ear. Upon further inspection I realized the student howling in pain and begging the teacher for forgiveness was Byun Baekhyun. “Mr.Choi I’m really sorry I didn’t mean to throw the paint on you I meant to throw it on Chanyeol.” 

“Enough,” Mr.Choi said obviously angry. “I feel so bad for your parents, to have to deal with you everyday,” Mr.Choi said to himself, but it was loud enough that even I was able to hear it from the back of the class. “There is no excuse for your behavior. Go to your seat now and get to work. And don’t forget you owe me detention after school today.” Baekhyun walked to his seat with a pout on his face. But after a few minutes he was laughing again with his friends. 

But I could feel it, how Mr.Choi’s comment had actually made Baekhyun feel. As soon as the words had left Mr.Choi’s lips I felt a heavy sense of guilt and sorrow, I could tell he thought the exact same thing and wished he was a better son. But whenever I looked at him he always had the biggest smile on his face. 

My name is Do Kyungsoo, and I am an empath, I have the ability to sense the emotions of others. No one knows this and I try to keep it that way, because of my powers I have already lost so many friends. When I was little I never realized I was special until people started to get angry at me for knowing and revealing what they really felt. People feel vulnerable when you tear down their masks and see what they really feel. I realized my powers were actually a curse early on in life when I realized that everytime my mom looked at my dad she never felt love, just disdain. After constantly asking my mom why she didn’t love daddy, she realized that I was right, and left both my dad and I when I was ten years old. Ever since then, whenever my powers are involved something always goes wrong. So I’ve distanced myself from other people. Because I will always pick loneliness over the lies and deceit of other people’s feelings.

Math was the last class of the day so I headed straight for the library to study. There was no one waiting for me at home anyway, and since I’ve isolated myself I’ve found a companion in the stories I find in the library. I’ve never been a good student but ever since I started studying due to the fact that I had nothing else to do with my free time, my grades showed a lot of improvement. Being alone made me a better person, it was the best decision for not only me but also those around me. I just wish being alone wasn’t always so cold and quiet. 

The sun was already starting to set since it was winter so I decided to pack up my things and head home. As I approached the bridge I passed everyday to get to my house I saw a figure sitting on the ledge. After a few seconds of walking I realized that the figure was Byun Baekhyun. I stood next to him and leaned on the bridge, his eyes were closed and he was just letting the breeze flow through his hair as he hummed a song I had heard on the radio before. “I love this weather, it really clears your head doesn’t it.” I said finally getting Baekhyun’s attention.

Baekhyun jumped a little, so I reached out to make sure he didn’t fall. “Oh my god you scared me,” he said finally opening his eyes and looking at me. “You’re Do Kyungsoo right,the quiet kid who sits in the back and never talks, we’re in the same class.” I nodded my head closing my eyes and letting the wind hit my face like Baekhyun had been doing earlier, I had not initiated a conversation in so long, the feeling almost foreign. As Baekhyun’s feelings started to surround me like a mist I realized that this is probably the most calm Baekhyun had felt, that I could remember, there was always some sort of sadness lurking in the background but at this moment all I felt was calm.

“What are you doing out here anyway? It’s pretty late, and it’s getting dark,” I turned to him and looked him in the eye feeling his sadness and self doubt creeping up. 

“Well, like you said, I find the weather calming. I just needed to clear my head a little,” Baekhyun responded turning around and jumping off the ledge so that he was instead standing right next to me. 

“Well why don’t we walk home together, it’s dark and if I remember correctly we live in the same direction.”

“Sure,” he said with a smile, a small but genuine smile. 

We walked side by side, not saying a word. We stopped in front of a white house exactly right next to mine. “Huh, so we’re neighbors,” I quietly whispered to myself. I watched Baekhyun, waiting for him to go to his door, but he just stood there, a lost look on his face. I reached into my pocket taking out a lollipop, “Hey Baekhyun.” He finally snapped out of his trance and turned to me and I handed him the lollipop. “Goodnight neighbor, don’t always stay out so late alone. It can get kind of scary being all alone,” I said before walking to my own house, right next to his.

I layed in bed confused by what had happened today. I usually liked to keep to myself, never really interacting with anyone else, especially when it had to do with their feelings and my ability. I turned on my side, looking at the picture frame on my desk and letting out a sigh. Kim Jongdae, my best friend, or at least was. He’s the reason I realized my abilities were really a curse, a horrible curse, I wish I could get rid of every single day. I thought back to Baekhyun earlier today, smiling and laughing with his friends. If it weren’t for my powers he could’ve fooled me, he just always seemed so lively and happy. But as soon as I was close enough to him I could feel the heart wrenching sadness and pain he was trying to cover up. He had the whole school fooled, teachers, his friends, probably even his own family. But his sadness was so strong it always overpowered the boredom and low hum of happiness that usually came from other students. I am probably the only person in the world other than Baekhyun that actually knows how he truly feels. And I know I should probably do something about it, use my powers for good. But I was scared that I would only make everything worse. Who am I to butt into his life, when the most we’ve interacted with each other in the three years I’ve known him was earlier today. I flailed my legs in frustration, letting out a huff. I never understood why I had been given these powers, I never knew what I was meant to do with them. As I looked out the window at the house next to mine to see Baekhyun’s room barely illuminated by a small lamp next to his bed, I made a decision. I would finally find out why exactly I had been given these powers.

The next day, I got to school pretty early. There wasn’t many people there, a few teachers and maybe four or five other students. I got to my classroom, opening the door and heading to my seat. I looked around to see no one else except Baekhyun, sleeping at his desk. I felt all my confidence from the night before disappear as I watched him sleep. Even in his sleep I could feel his sadness and discomfort, he was probably having a nightmare. I wanted to help, but the more I looked at him the more confidence I lost. Who was I to interfere in his life? No I had to do this, I couldn’t just stand by and watch. I walked up to Baekhyun and tapped his shoulder. He looked up at me blinking his eyes slowly, still disoriented from sleep, “Sorry to interrupt, but do you happen to know what the math homework is?” 

He looked at me confused, and then pointed at the board where the assignment was written down. “It’s written up there.” 

I internally screamed at my stupidity, “Oh um thanks I didn’t see that, I’m like kinda blind I guess. But like I’m not actually blind I just have really bad astigmatism and I’m not wearing my glasses right now. I should probably put those on right now,” I heard a giggle and looked up at Baekhyun to see him laughing. I also felt his sadness slowly die down to a lower hum as a small wave of happiness overpowered it. “I’m rambling aren’t I, well um, I’m sorry for bothering you.” I hurriedly tried to get back to my seat before I could make an even bigger fool of myself.

“You’re cute Kyungsoo, maybe you aren’t as boring as I thought,” Baekhyun turned to me and said, giving me a big smile.

My face started to heat up at the compliment, was it a compliment, I don’t even know. But before I could respond to him, his loud friend Chanyeol walked in already complaining about all the homework he didn’t do. 

After that day it become somewhat of a routine. Baekhyun would sit next to me in the mornings and we’d talk, sometimes we’d even sit in silence as I read a book and Baekhyun took a nap. But during the morning is the only time Baekhyun would emit a feeling of calmness. Then as soon as Chanyeol came in Baekhyun would move to his seat next to Chanyeol and they’d be their usual loud and chaotic selves. But as soon as Baekhyun started yelling and joking around, I could feel his anxiety and sadness rising. As if he feared that he wasn’t doing enough, that someone would see past his mask of fake happiness. Exactly like I had. I didn’t know what to do. As I got closer to Baekhyun, I felt Baekhyun become more calm and happy but as soon as he was surrounded by a lot of people I’d feel a wave of anxiety and fear wash over both him and me. 

I didn’t know what I should do with this information; should I ignore it like usual? I hated confrontation, I hated getting involved where I didn’t belong. But what would happen to Baekhyun if no one reached out to him, was I really looking out for him or just looking out for myself. I knew what could happen if I allowed Baekhyun’s thoughts to continue to manifest and most outcomes didn’t lead anywhere good. The bell rang signaling the beginning of the school day, the teacher asked everyone to quiet down, mostly talking to Baekhyun and Chanyeol. As I stared at Baekhyun smile, a smile that never really met his eyes, I knew what I had to do.

I decided to talk to Chanyeol, approaching Baekhyun directly might not be the best choice considering the fact that our friendship was still new. I passed along a note to him telling him to meet me at the rooftop at lunch. When the note reached Chanyeol he looked around to try and find out where the note had come from. The bell rang and people started to take out their lunch and got up to sit near their friends. 

“Hey Baek I’m gonna go to the bathroom really quick okay,” Chanyeol told Baekhyun before hurriedly heading towards the roof like my note had told him. I waited a few minutes before following close behind him. Once I reached the rooftop I saw Chanyeol already there leaning against the wall. Before I could say anything Chanyeol had beat me to it, “Oh my god, I thought the note was from some girl who wanted to confess to me, Do Kyungsoo, do you perhaps like me?”

My cheeks quickly turned red from embarrassment, “No I wanted to talk to you about Baekhyun actually.”

“Oh my god! Do you like Baekhyun? Do you want me to set you up with him, aw thats so cute. I mean if you really do like him I could put in a good word for you,” Chanyeol continued on making me more red and embarrassed. 

“No Chanyeol,” I tried interrupting him. “Chanyeol!” I finally yelled getting his attention. “I actually have something really serious to tell you,” saying this made Chanyeol automatically shut up. “Baekhyun, he’s, well I think,” I kept stuttering and stumbling over my words. “Wait no I know,” I corrected and took a deep breath to get ready for what I was about to say. “Baekhyun’s depressed.” As soon as I said it the expression on Chanyeol’s face was the most serious I had ever seen it. I could feel his anger, and deep deep under the anger I could feel worry and fear. 

“Who the fuck do you think you are?” Chanyeol screamed making me flinch.

“Chanyeol you don’t understand,” I tried explaining only to get cut off by Chanyeol.

“No, what you don't understand is that you need to learn your place. I am Baekhyun’s best friend, and who the fuck are you to tell me, his best friend,” Chanyeol said emphasizing best friend as he pushed me back. “That he is depressed. If he was really depressed I think I would know.” 

“Chanyeol he’s suicidal, he needs help,” I said just barely above a whisper.

Chanyeol scoffed, “Is this about that emo friend of yours, what was his name Kim Jongdae?” I saw red as soon as that name come out of Chanyeol’s mouth. I wasn’t thinking straight and all I could feel was anger, his anger, my anger and I punched him making Chanyeol fall to the floor from shock. I got on top of him and kept punching him. 

“Baekhyun just fucking needs help and you could be the one to provide it,” I said before punching him again. Chanyeol flipped us over so he was now on top of me. 

“Well like I’ve already said multiple times before I’m his best friend,” he said before punching me. “So I would know if he needed any fucking help.”   
“What the fuck is going on?” we both looked over to see Baekhyun. “Chanyeol you were in the bathroom for an awful long time so I decided to come looking for you. Why are you on top of Do Kyungsoo and fuck!” Baekhyun exclaimed running towards both of us. “You’re both bleeding let’s get you both to the nurse’s.” I could feel the confusion and anger from Baekhyun as we all walked to the school’s infirmary. Once we had gotten there the nurse realized Chanyeol and I had been in a fight and sent the both of us to the principles and Baekhyun back to class. The principal had decided to call our parents and send us home with a warning.

Of course my dad was too busy at work so my aunt had picked me up and dropped me off at home. I walked into my house slamming the door behind me and running to my room. I flopped on my bed staring up at my ceiling. This is why I didn’t get involved, fuck, why am I so stupid. But as I turned my head to see the window to Baekhyun’s room all I could think about was how I still needed to help Baekhyun. My vision focused on the picture on my desk. I thought back to when Chanyeol had brought up Jongdae earlier and my chest started to hurt. I thought back to the day, the day that I truly lost everything. 

Today was our friendiversary as Jongdae liked to call it. I had met Jongdae when I had gone to a park when I was around five. I had gone to the park with my mom who was too busy talking on the phone to watch me. I fell while running and started crying yet my mom just ignored me. A little boy approached me and asked me if I was okay. I just pointed to my then bleeding knee, my cries not calming down. He helped me walk to the water fountain and cleaned my scrape with some water and put a bandaid on. “All better right,” he told me smiling. “My name is Jongdae and I’ve decided we’re going to be best friends.” 

I carried the cake I had baked towards Jongdae’s house. Every year I would bake a cake and we would decorate the cake together. I knocked on the door waiting for an answer, when I didn’t receive any I used the key that Jongdae had given me. I put the cake down and started walking towards his room calling out his name. When he still didn’t answer I started to panic and ran towards his room. When I opened the door I fell to the floor. On his bed Jongdae laid, as if he was just sleeping but all around him there were pills scattered everywhere as well as a note placed on the desk next to him. I hoped it was a lie tried searching for any sign of his emotions only to meet silence and my own sadness. I opened up the letter Jongdae had apologized and said it wasn’t my fault he just couldn’t handle the sadness anymore. But all I could think about was how this was my fault of course it was my fault. Because I knew. Whenever we hung out I could feel his sadness despite his smiles but I ignored it because of my stupid rule of not getting involved. I let my best friend, the only person in the world that I cared about suffer all on his own. 

I aggressively wiped at the tears running down my face as I thought back to Kim Jongdae. I couldn’t let that happen to Baekhyun, I wouldn’t let that happen. I looked out the window and realized the sun had already set and that it was evening. After taking a few breaths I got up to head over to Baekhyun’s house to talk to him. I opened my own door about to walk out only to realize Baekhyun was standing in front of me. His anger hit me like a slap all at once.

“What the fuck Kyungsoo?” Baekhyun yelled at me. “Chanyeol told me why the two of you fought today and he was right, because you have no right to say I have depression. You need to mind your own fucking business. And don’t talk to me ever again you weirdo, I just felt bad for you because you have no friends.” When Baekhyun said that my heart dropped and all I could do is stare at him as he walked away. I closed the door and dragged myself back to my room. So I was what, a weirdo? A charity case? I scoffed and once again wiped away at my tears. Fine then, fuck Baekhyun why should I help him all I am is a weirdo right. 

When I came back to school on Monday I decided to walk to school late to avoid sitting in the class with Baekhyun alone. As soon as I walked in people started to point at me and whisper. I guess I was no longer the quiet, lonely, kid. I was now the quiet, lonely, weirdo. I drew into myself more, no longer spending any more time than needed in the classroom surrounded by the people that hated me. I could feel everyone’s judgement as they looked at me, literally. I hate this stupid power why had it been given to me. It just makes no sense this stupid power, no this stupid curse, ruined my life and everyone else's and that’s all it’s good for. 

Days passed by, me continuing to be on my own, Baekhyun continuing to pretend to be happy. One day I went to class early again because my dad decided to bring me to school. When I walked into class the only other person was Byun Baekhyun. I walked to my desk with my head down. What I felt from Baekhyun was weird and unusual. It wasn’t his usual calm he felt in the mornings, it wasn’t anxiety, sadness, or even happiness, it felt as if he was content. As the day went on Baekhyun’s mood didn’t deviate from what I had felt this morning. I walked home thinking about Baekhyun and what that could mean. I looked at his house to see the lights on but his parents’ car nowhere to be seen, which was odd considering the time, usually both his parents would be home by now. I thought back to previous conversations we had in the morning as I walked into my house. What was today? I tried to think if there was any significance to the date. Finally I realized today his parents would be in Busan visiting his older brother. I thought back to Baekhyun’s feeling earlier today. 

“Maybe I should go check on him,” I thought to myself. “Wait he told me to mind my own fucking business because I’m a freak.” I looked up at my ceiling and thought back to that day, his anger, his words. But as I thought more about it I realized it wasn’t just anger because deep deep down under the anger I could feel relief that someone had finally noticed, a small cry for help. And then I realized how stupid I was to not realize that all that anger was fake. I bolted upright and ran to Baekhyun's house. I pounded on the door calling for Baekhyun, when I got no answer I frantically looked for any spare keys. I found one under the welcome mat and opened the door with shaky hands. I ran in calling Baekhyun’s name running into the living room. I tried to calm down, taking a few deep breaths. I heard what sounded like a running bath making me run to the bathroom. I tried the doorknob, which of course was locked. “Baekhyun! Please Baekhyun open the door. Please!” I yelled trying to jiggle the doorknob more frantically. “Baekhyun if you don’t answer in the next few seconds I’m knocking down this door.” I started to throw my body against the door in an attempt to break it down. After three tries, it started to catch up on my body. As I got ready to hit the door for a fourth time the door opened. I looked into the bathroom to see Baekhyun, his eyes red and puffy, the bathtub still running, and pill bottles scattered all over the place. 

“Kyungsoo help me, please,” I ran to Baekhyun and caught him as he collapsed into me. We both slid down to the floor, Baekhyun in my arms.

“I’m here to help,” I said into Baekhyun’s hair. “And so is Chanyeol, and so are your parents we’re all here for you.” I said pecking him on the forehead as I ran my fingers through his hair. “I’ll, we all, will always and I mean always be here for you.” And then for the first time I ever I felt both happiness and relief, with not even a hint of sadness, wash over both me and Baekhyun.


End file.
